Monday, July 10, 2006

Blogger hopping

Some people call it blogger surfing and others call it blogger hopping. I like seeing what other people are blogging about. I found cathy_bythesea over the weekend (my first Frappr pin in the Philippines!) and she talked about the loss of her father in, "On Losing A Parent:"
I lost my dad when I was sixteen, in the summer before my senior year in high school, on the brink of womanhood. For many years I grieved his loss and looking back now, I realize that I was searching for my father in many of the relationships that I had. Dad, became the yardstick that men had to live up to. Those who knew him well, know that daddy was definitely a hard act to follow. Admittedly perhaps, this is the same reason why I married someone much older, whether fair or not, I was looking for my father when I finally decided to get married. This was something that took me many years to resolve, and when I finally did, through much introspection and by the grace of God, just as the quote above says, it certainly opened doors that I would not have dared walk into many years ago, altered my outlook and changed the dynamics of many of my major relationships.
Fine Art Doctor also talked about the loss of this father in, "Thoughts on July 4th and Memories of My Father:"
My father died when I was seven years old. He woke up one morning with a headache and went to work. While rounding at the hospital he collapsed. He was immediatley taken to the ER but it was too late. He had a ruptured Cerebral anneurysm and the neurosurgeons told my mom there was nothing they could do. As the years pass I find that my memory of my father has faded. I can no longer rememeber the way he smelled, the way he walked, the sound of his voice. If I concentrate I can still see his image in my mind but I often wonder if the recollection is from pictures.
These two selections have really made me reflect upon my own relationship with my father. Even Cathy (not by the sea) recently wrote a cute recollection of her father drinking and singing at her wedding (funny story). What kind of relationship do I have with my father? You always think that you're going to have more time to make great memories, but you never know when your last memory is going to be. I think I'll give my dad a call, maybe he wants to play golf tonight...


Cathy said...

Yes Dr. A. right now is the time to make more memories. My Dad has been gone for 16 years now. I've been thinking alot about the memories we made.

Thanks for the link...:)

Wrkinprogress said...

Hug your dad for me, Doc. I lost my dad at 16 also, and regret not having had the chance to know him as an adult.

Anonymous said...

having lost my mom when i was young... i have learned not to take for granted that i still have my father.. we have become very close over the years since my moms death.. i charish that!!!

Dreaming again said...

I have had 2 father's in my life. Both entered my life at infancy. My mom met my step dad when I was 4 months old, married him when I was 13 months old.

He was, my Daddy. I was, his princess.

My real father, has always been a part of my life. Never fully rejecting me, never fully accepting me.

He was, my father. I was, his offspring.

My step father died when I was 14. Leaving me with my real father.

There is no doubt that both fathers have had a profound influence.

Anonymous said...

Great post, Dr. A ... very affective. You've touched everyone, with that.

Not that long ago (mid May) I blogged about my Dad. He's been gone for 19 years now, and I still can hear his voice, see his expressions, and imagine what he would think about the various events of every day living.

If he were alive today, he'd be 103.

Cathy is right ... make memories now!

Daddies are so precious ... continuing without them means being incomplete, somehow ...

NeoNurseChic said...

Sorry that this is off topic, but I'm blogger hopping over (is that like island hopping?) to make an invitation for the next BA mtg to be at the beach house over at NeoNurseChic! I just replied to you in the comments on my latest post, but we've got plenty of room here, and who couldn't use a day at the beach! This blogger addiction thing can be kinda stressful, and we all need a little vacation!! (Of course, a vacation that requires plenty of blogging....while bumming on the beach!)

As for fathers......last September, my dad was rushed to the ER by ambulance because he collapsed in our driveway. It was one of the scariest things our family has ever been through. I'm definitely a "Daddy's girl" and can't imagine life without him...even though someday I will have to. :( My dad's dad died from a massive PE when my dad was 16, and then his step-father (the only grandpa I ever knew on his side of the family) died in 1996 from chemotherapy used to treat pre-leukemia. My dad is such a role model for me for so many reasons. I'll have to blog about it at some point!

Take care,
Carrie :)

Cathy B said...

Awwww... thanks Dr. A! Yes, life is so short and that is why it is best spent on the people who matter and on activities that help heal the world. Hope you get to do your round of golf with your dad soon!

Dream Mom said...

I lost my father when I was 13 years old. Looking back, I am amazed at what he was able to accomplish and the fond memories that I have. He used to take me everywhere with him although I did have two sisters and a brother. One day, some time ago, we were reminising about my Dad. One of my sisters said that she was the favorite, then I said I was the favorite and it went on and on. We had a great time and I thought about what a wonderful gift he gave each of us to think that we all thought that we were his favorite.

My father was 46 when he died. Now that I am 48, I see how young that was and understand how my mother must have felt to be alone and raise four children. I also see how important a father is for my son who is now 14. I am lucky he still has his Dad who is a wonderful father.